What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 03.07.2025 01:28

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
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Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Is homosexuality an excommunicable offense in Christianity?
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
Why is Meghan Markle struggling with her Hollywood connections?
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
What are the reasons why am I so tired before my period?
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Why does Rahul Gandhi have so many haters?
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
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“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Make Nazis afraid again!
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Quidem dolorum id soluta eius id maxime quas.
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
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Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
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In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …